gnomedge gnamed

~ gnomedge as Billy Gibbons from ZZTop ~

Come on, admit it - you've been on the edge of your seat for weeks waiting to find out what name I decided on for my gnew gnomedge. Could you believe the large list of gnames I shared at the end of THIS POST? And more were added after I had compiled that list: 

Gimley

Perth

Tam O'Shanter

Stratton

Paddy

Michaelmas

Lupine

Sherwood

Rapscallion

Edinburgh

Fizgig

I had no idea how hard it would be to choose! I didn't want to just pull a name out of a hat or anything like that, since I felt this needed to be a personal decision. MY GNOME, YOU GKNOW! I worked so hard on this dadgum gnome, and doggone it, I've become quite attached to him. I like the cheerful little dude. 

So to end your suspense, I'll tell you right now that GNONE of you won! Don't get me wrong, I loved ALL your gnome gnames! And I particularly loved that you'd take the time to think of a gname and make a comment! But none of them seemed, well, him. I even resorted to the online Gnome Gname Generator (yes, there really IS such a thing!) but still came up empty. I definitely had some favorites from your suggestions though, and I've chosen 3 to be my Honorable Mentions and still receive a prize!

Corky Mugwiggen from Theresa & Katie Jensen

Comfortably Gnome from Kevin Walker 

(the Pink Floyd reference nearly DID. ME. IN.)

Mardybum from Traci Moore

Each honorable mention will receive a box of my gnew gnome gnotecards :) 

 gnome gname: Rapscallion! 

Rapscallion is a word my father, who was Scottish, used to refer to us kids as mischievous ne'er-do-wells... and that we'd better behave or he'd "kick our teeth in" or "slap us silly". In turn, I used it as a term for my own mischievous boys when they were younger - though I don't recall ever threatening to kick their teeth in or slap them silly :/ Gnomes are mainly woodland creatures who love, watch over, and heal all animals - though they do have a tendency to be very mischievous at times! I gknew his gname had to be Rapscallion, and Rapscallion it is! Challenge me and I'll kick your teeth in. Or slap you silly.

Rapscallion... hehehehe :)

gnome home

My long time readers will probably remember this, however any new readers may not have seen  -----> THIS BLOG POST <----- about gnomes. Or as I affectionately call them both individually or in plural..... gnomedge. Quick recap: I always thought gnomedge were the freaky and sad hobby and/or downward spiral of older people who were also attracted to hideous plastic yard ornaments. Over the years I have softened my opinions on gnomedge in general, as they have appeared in a few movies/tv shows/commercials I actually liked. Plus it seems they have also evolved into more jolly looking creatures rather than ones you fear have slipped out from under their mushrooms to hide under your bed at night. (good grief - just click on the highlighted post above) 

ANYWAY. I have casually been on the lookout for a large, colorful, jolly-looking gnome, being that I tend to like large, colorful, jolly-looking things. I'm extremely picky however, about anything I bring into my home that has a FACE. So I hadn't had much luck. Then just a few weeks ago, the day my cousin Shelly & I went to the nursery to pick out flowers for my porch (aka. the day I stood there brain dead and drooling while Shell made decisions for me)........ there he was! GNOMEDGE!!! Large. Jolly-looking. Ridiculously expensive. Not colorful. But overflowing with gnomedge potential. Dare I say....... a project! After just a few minutes of debate, Shell & I took our gnome home. I think we actually giggled much of the way :)


So here begins our gnome transformation from "Before" to "After" - and it's been an amazing journey!   Because I am freaking A.MAZ.ING.

 Found him! Near-perfect gnome looking dull and drab, sad and sorry... 

but with gnomedge potential off the charts of the Gnome Meter! 

 * my fave pics of Shell & I *

Above is my mid-way peek... starting first coats of color... pant color not decided on... his skin is still a nauseating yellow... no definition in his beard. His facial features and beard took me a long time - I think I must have done his beard at least 4 times, maybe more, before I got it right. My family thinks I've officially lost my mind. Whatevskies. 

I am sooooo happy about how he turned out! Look, look, LOOK!!!

 Is he the cutest gnome EVER or WHAT?!?! 

He almost has a "Seven Dwarfs" look about him, which I just love.

 I think it's cute how he holds his hands behind his back

 I like his face a lot. It took me FOR.EV.ER. I was bound and determined to make his face as cheerful as possible. Even his tongue needed to be changed, and the lines around his eyes defined. Changing his pasty yellowish skin to a flesh tone made a huge difference, as did adding some definition to his facial hair and beard. That was a challenge, but even more challenging was giving him his rosy cheeks and nose. First he looked like a clown (SCARY), then he looked like he had a bad case rosacea, then his teenage years came back to bite him in the butt with pock marks....... aargh! I really LOVE the final results :) John says I made him look like he's been drinking too much, but to me he just looks jolly and cheerful. So maybe he DID toss back a few, hehe :)

 Mehhhhh!!! Stranger danger! Help! 

More gnomage fun to come this week, so stay tuned!

I know you'll be waiting on the edge of your seats!

gnomebody gnomes the gnomes that I've seen

I've never paid a great deal of attention to gnomes. 

I categorized them, at best, in the way far reaches of the back of my brain, 

as odd things old people hid about their lawns, like plastic deer and flamingos.

Scrunchy, dried-apple-like faces... supposedly cute but potentially frightening.

*one dang freaky-looking gnome*

~

I was, however, enamored by the gnome scene in the movie The Full Monty,

when dancing gnomes literally steal the show during a job interview.

*gnome apology*

~

I've since learned that people are very particular and protective of their gnomes.

And that there are all kinds of gnomes, and all kinds of gnome manufacturers,

that produce gnomes from the size of a thimble to the size of a large planter.

In short (no pun intended... okay, it was intended), gnomes are big business.

*Travelocity Roaming Gnome*

~

Then several years ago, the Travelocity Roaming Gnome came along.

A roly poly fellow with a pleasant, almost Santa-like face, and endearingly witty.

In one brilliant stroke of marketing genius, the Roaming Gnome  

became a much-needed poster child for gnomedge everywhere.

Figurines of the guy sell like bangers & mash and he has his own fan club.

Over the last few years, I hesitate saying, I've become a bit gnome-enamored.

As it turns out, I might actually like one hanging around. Here.

*Pierpont, Babette's gnome from "Gilmore Girls" (held by Luke)*

~

Enter Pierpont the gnome, next door neighbor to the Gilmore residence.

Not too freaky. Pretty cute, as gnomes go. And he gets actual screen time.

I think Pierpont was the turning point. I am ready.

The search has not been easy.

Most gnomes are either so ridiculous or so completely terrifying,

 the thought would never even occur to me to invite one to lurk in my yard.

Recently however, I've actually found a few possibilities!

*gnome possibilities*

~

These 3 are not completely hideous. I like all their detail and color and large size.

Though I do wish their faces were a bit more Roaming Gnome-like.

I will continue to search until my home has a gnome.

Want to know the most favorite gnome I've seen yet?

You can only see one side of him, but I love everything about him. 

I saw him on Stephanie Nielsen's blog (the Nie Nie Dialogues), in a family photo.

Sorry Nie - I stole your photo. I'm only using it for my own gnome purposes.

But if you'd like to tell me where you found him, or let him come live with me, 

or better yet find me one just like him... I would be most appreciative :)

*gnome envy*

~

Have a great day everyone!

And tell me about your gnomedge likes/dislikes/requirements if you have any!